4 Ways to Develop Your Emotional Intelligence

May 29, 2019 1:07pm

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is defined as the ability to be aware of, express, and control one’s emotions and the ability to be empathetic toward others. Those who have a higher EQ tend to be higher performing and more successful in the workplace. Understanding your emotions and having control over them can enhance your relationships in your job and beyond. Here are a few ways to better develop your EQ.

Know what creates stress for you

A large part of increasing your emotional intelligence is knowing what situations, events and even people have a tendency to stress you out. Once you have pinpointed what causes you stress you can take the appropriate steps to reduce or eliminate it. If you know that an upcoming work project might set you into a frenzy, don’t procrastinate. Make a list of what obstacles you might have and be proactive by mapping out how you will deal with those roadblocks head on. Being around stressed out coworkers just creates more stress and bad morale. Not only will having less stress improve your own mental health, it will make you a better person to work with and more productive in your career overall.

Learn to communicate thoughtfully

Even though you might attempt to be proactive when dealing with stressful situations, some will still sneak up on you without warning and it’s important you keep your negative emotions under control. Communication is key. Take the time you need once you have found yourself frustrated and work to find the appropriate words to express your feelings. This also includes your body language. You might be saying one thing but your body language could be saying something entirely different. Misunderstandings can often lead to more issues between coworkers. Thoughtful and effective verbal and nonverbal communication will yield a more productive and positive workplace for yourself and those around you.

Be more empathetic

You’ve likely heard the phrase “put yourself in someone else’s shoes” in some variation since you were a child. In a nutshell, this is empathy. Allowing yourself to take a step back and think about what another person is going through or how they might be perceiving a situation is a key part of developing your EQ. Before you judge a situation, try and take it all in. Think about the different viewpoints of the person or people involved. Imagine what they might be dealing with or where they are coming from. How would you feel if you were them? While this doesn’t justify poor work performance or behavior, it will help when you have to face challenging situations in the workplace.

Be optimistic

Chances are if you start each work day with a good attitude, your day will go more smoothly. You will certainly encounter problems, but having a good attitude is a key part of emotional intelligence and can help resolve those issues. Instead of whining about a difficult coworker or stressful situation in the workplace, ask yourself how you and others can learn from it. What can you take away from it? Did a customer call with an issue or complaint you had never encountered before? How did you handle that situation? What did you learn from that customer’s problem? How will you and others handle a situation like it differently in the future to achieve a more positive outcome? There is always a silver lining. Choosing to see it is a characteristic of emotional intelligence.